With a blinding light
And a smell that could melt a full grown wombat
Borry said “Settle down cock fucker.”
“Have a go at ya, who shat in your lunch box?”
The demonic entity eye raped Borry
But he’ll have none of that
“I am The Fist of Eureka, and no cunt’s ever
gonna fuck with that!”

Yet here stands the Cunt of Cunts
The demon lord that’s gonna fuck you up
“Open the box of beer and pack the bong,
let’s settle this cunt - thong dick thong”

The Cunt of Cunts tells Borry if he wins
He can have whatever he wants
Borry wins the battle with a powerful strike
Shattering the demon’s cods
The dark lord balled up in pain
Said “Ok cunt, whatchya want?”
“I want to be the best Aussie metal drummer
in the fucken world”
“It is done”
In a cloud of dust he disappears
Like Satan’s grandma’s dildo
He punched some cones and grabbed his box
“Righto, it’s time to go”

He’s pissed as fuck, he sees a shadow in his truck
He opens the door and says “What the fuck?”
With Gemima pointed high he says “Step outside”
The figure hits the road and says
“I reary want a ride”
The sunrise shows itself
And reveals that the stow away
Was a small Asian sheila with sick tits
Who was dressed like a schlong magnet

And she said “My name is Migoumi,
got nowhere to go and I’m reary sad”
Borry said “Sick cunt” picked her up
And spiral cut out passed her into the cab

While he was fucking her he couldn’t believe
That such a small little sheila could cop it so sweet
Usually he’d scare the women with his monster cock
But Migoumi, she wrestled it like Irwin on a croc
That morning she got pregnant 4 times
With a fight in mind in Mt Isa
He gunned it down the road
He snorts some wizzer off her tits
While she packs a cone

Cyclists on the road
Borry thought he needed some fresh air
Crawls out through the window to the bonnet
Farts twice, loads Gemima
Blasting middle aged spandex suss cunts
Pulls up to an old pub
Called The Drunken Dingo Inn

A Cold Chisel cover band was playing while he ordered
7 schooners for himself
A pot of pink lemonade

And a pack of twisties for Migoumi
The drummer of the band throws his sticks to Borry
“Have a go cunt”
“Yeah fucken righto”

The sickest beats blast through the pub
Thunder cracks outside
Happy cheers turn into screams
People start to die
Solo finished, sticks are thrown
Melted corpses, limbs are lost
Migoumi’s in the pokie room
Giving birth to the sons of Boz
He named them all -
Lorry, Semi, Truck and Dog
His boys were born with beards and all

“You boys are gonna fucken need to work,
So here’s a hard hat each and a hi-viz shirt
Clean yourself up. Mum, get back in the truck
Wish me luck, make your dad proud
Run amok, don’t give a fuck Got a fight, gotta go, might catch yas round if I’m ever in town Probably not, anyway, I’m Isa bound.”
He’s back on the road again

He hits the picks at Isa Foodworks
And people start to gather
Borry got Migoumi put five hundjy on him for the win
There stands ‘Jimmy Two Papers’
A bare knuckle street fighter from Hervey Bay

The fight began and J2P hit him really fucken hard
With a left hook that binged him on the beak
Borry laughed “Are you jokin cunt?”
Blood dripped into his beard

The Fist of Eureka’s eyes went white
Threw a devastating right
It crushed Jimmy Two Paper’s throat
And it threw him to the ground
He grinded Jimmy’s face off with his beard

Then he put Jimmy in a trolley
And wheeled him to a Cleanaway truck
That’s about to pick up a bin
He kicked the driver out of the truck
Impaled Jimmy on the bin pickerupperer
And loaded him the bin
Put a brick on the pedal
Sent the truck off a cliff

And then he lit a spliff